Kolintogba

Japanese has distinctive male and female “gendered” languages in the spoken form. The written language is neutral. The difference is much more pronounced in informal conversations, and in the most formal spoken language, the difference is usually limited to the use of gender-specific pronouns.

Getting this wrong will often have hilarious effects. “I will kill you” spoken in the most girlish way will almost sound sweet, and “I will give you a hug” in the most macho way will sound like “I will crush you to death”. Many young foreigners who come to Japan learn Japanese through their Japanese boyfriends/girlfriends, and often end up learning the gendered language of the opposite sex.

Here are examples of gendered languages:

• 僕は君のことを愛してるよ -> I love you (A male speaking to a female)
• 私はあなたのこと愛してるわ -> I love you (A female speaking to a male)

Note the differences of pronoun “I” and “you”, and the ending particles.

In this program, male-specific and female-specific vocabularies are respectively marked [男] and [女] as shown below:

As a basic rule, the more casual and/or rude language becomes, it sounds more masculine. So if you are a woman, you can sound less masculine just by avoiding rude, vulgar language.

• 早くしろ -> Hurry up (Male. Rude)
• 早くして -> Hurry up (M & F)
• 飯食いに行こう (めしくいに) -> Let’s go get something to eat (Male. Peer-level)
• 御飯食べに行こう (ごはんたべに) -> Let’s go get something to eat (M & F. Peer-level)

Aside from that, the gendered languages have several components:

• Gender-specific pronouns: “I” and “you” have gender-specific forms (and with multiple different levels of respect) in Japanese
• Gender-specific sentence endings
• Gender-specific vocabulary: As already mentioned, uncouth, rude and/or vulgar expressions are usually considered masculine. You can find them in “Search using attributes” page, searching with “Gender=Masculine” option
• Use of the politeness prefix “御” before nouns: The use of “御” is not limited to women, men use them as well to sound politer, but women use more than men. Note that “御” is not added to just any noun. Unfortunately there is no hard clear rule and it is rather based on random practices.

Command/Request

Imperatives of verbs in their original forms are very aggressive, and usually used only by males in authoritative positions (and even for them, it sounds very domineering). Females, and males in more civil tones, will use the ending particle “て”:

• こっちへ来い -> Come over here (M, very rude)
• こっちに来て -> Come over here (M & F, Casual)
• 静かにしろ -> Stop making noise (M, very rude)
• 静かにして -> Stop making noise (M & F, Casual)

• “てね” is a gentle request, and mainly used by females (and children):
  • みんな、仲良くしてね -> Everybody, be nice to each other, OK?
  • 優しくしてね -> Be nice to me, OK?
• “頂戴” is often used by adult females to family members:
  • 早くして頂戴 -> Will you hurry up?
• “下さる” is used by adult females. Sounds very formal and somewhat old-fashioned
  • 話を遮るは止めて下さる？ -> Would you stop interrupting me?

Gender-specific endings:

• “か”
  • 形容詞, 名詞, the stem of 形容動詞 directly followed by “か” are only used by males
    • お前バカか？-> Are you stupid?
    • お前本気か？ -> Are you serious?
    • これ美味しいか？ -> Is this delicious?
    • これやったのおまえか？ -> Are you the who did this?
• “が”
  • Protest, disdain “が” are only used by males
    • 文句言ってもしょうが無いだろうが -> It won’t do any good bitching and moaning
  • Inform, wish “が” are used by both males and females
• “かい” is usually used by males, but often used by old females in dramas as well
  • お前が千鶴かい？ -> Are you Chizuru?
• “かしら” is used by females only
  • 誰かしら？ -> Who can it be? (F, casual)
• “かよ” is only used by males
  • またかよ？ -> Again?
  • マジかよ？ -> Seriously? Gotta be kidding!
• “こと” is used only by females, and mostly in a theatrical way
• “さ” at the very end of the sentence is used usually only by males
• “ぜ” is used only by males, and mostly in a theatrical way
• “ぞ” is used mostly by males, and mostly in a theatrical way
• “給え (たまえ)” is used only by senior males
• “とも” is used only males, and mostly in a theatrical way
• “な” is used only by males in command and question (see the link for the details)
  • 文句言うな -> Don’t complain
  • これで良いんだな？ -> This will do, right?
• “ね”
  • 名詞, the stem of 形容動詞 directly followed by “ね” is only used by females
    • なんか変ね -> Something is not right
    • きれいな色ね -> What a beautiful color
• “の” has some usages specific to females (see the link for the details)
• “のか” in question is used only by males
  • これで良いのか？ -> Will this do? Is this what you want?
  • 本当なのか？ -> Is that true?
• “のよ” is used only by females
  • あそこのラーメンおいしいのよ -> The ramen of that restaurant is very good
• “もの” is used only by females
• “や” is used only by males in suggestion (see the link for other usages)
  • おい、行こうや -> Hey, let’s go
• “よ”
  • 名詞, the stem of 形容動詞 directly followed by “よ” is only used by females
    • そんなの嫌よ -> No, I don’t like/want that
    • これじゃ駄目よ -> This is not good, this won’t do it
    • それ私の携帯よ -> That’s my cell phone
• “よね”
  • The stem of 形容動詞 directly followed by “よね” is only used by females
    • あの人はいつもああよね -> He/she is always that way
• “わ” is used only by females
  • こんな水着着るの恥ずかしいわ -> I’m too embarrassed to wear a swimsuit like this (F)
  • 褒めてもらって嬉しいわ -> I’m flattered for the praise (F)

Note that in Kansai (関西 : the area around Osaka) dialect “わ” is used equally by men and women. Since many star comedians in Japan come from Kansai, their dialects are well-known nationwide. As a result men could use “わ” as well, even though Kansai dialect involves not just different vocabulary but different intonations, so without them it can sound a little off.

• あいつの相手なんかするのはアホらしいわ -> It feels stupid, it is a waste of time, to deal with him (M)
• あ、こりゃ駄目だわ -> Oh, this ain’t working (M)

• “わよ“, “わよね” and “わね” are used only females
  • 今日本当に暑いわね -> It is really hot today
  • 本当に嫌になっちゃうわよね -> I’m really getting tired of this

One last note: There are cases of men using female-talks, and women using male-talks, on purpose. Women using male-talks is typically done for sounding boyish or tough, while men using female-talks are not making fun of women, but rather to take edges off tough-sounding male-talks and to soften the tone between male friends.